I Am An Original

This past year has been both hard and also an extremely eye opening time. So I decided To share a one of my revelations with you.

In the past couple months I have felt as if my circumstances were controlling me instead of the other way around. I realized that if I didn’t take some control and ownership over my life I was going to lose my mind. Last time I felt like this, I realized that working out really helped me process my mental pain. So I figured, why not start with that again. Working out always gives me a small sense of control over my body. So I have been doing a variety of different workouts that are fun and really help relieve so much stress. Since I work out at home I constantly see one particular picture on my wall.

The poster is a quote from the song ‘Wait for It’ from the wonderful and groundbreaking musical Hamilton. The quote is “I am the one thing in life I can control.” Side note: Small plug, if you have never listened to or seen this musical you are missing out. Now I love most musicals but even my friends who hate them still appreciate and enjoy Hamilton. So open up that Disney+ app or find someone who has an account and enjoy!

Anyway, whenever I work out I see this poster and the lines from the song fly through my head.

I am the one thing in life I can control
Wait for it Wait for it
I am inimitable I am an original

In the song Aaron Burr describes feeling second rate as he watches Alexander Hamilton “take” everything he wants. He sees this other man always coming in first and he is doomed to be second best. But during the whole song he is convincing himself that if he just waits it out, he will also be rewarded for his efforts. Now I do not agree with the idea that if you always wait you will eventually succeed. I think there is wisdom in waiting and in knowing when to take action. The real beauty of this song to me, however, is when he reminds himself that the only thing he has control over is himself. He acknowledges that he is unique. He is trying to remind himself not to doubt who he is.

One day, at the end of my workout, I stood there sweaty and alone. All I could think was “I am the one thing in life I can control.” Nobody else has control over what I do. Nobody else can determine what I am capable of because I am an original. In the Bible it says I am “fearfully and wonderfully made”, knitted together by God.
I am an original.

I sat down and stretched. I realized that I was letting time get to me instead of taking advantage of it. With so many opinions rolling around today I felt lost. I felt like I had nothing to add to the conversations. I began to feel like I couldn’t add anything to help others.

But as I continued to work out and dance in my house, week after week, my confidence grew. I just kept seeing that sign, “I am the one thing in life I can control”. Work out after sweaty work out I started to tell myself that my opinions and thoughts were relevant; I was relevant.

I can only control myself. I can’t make everyone like me. I can’t force people to agree with me. I spend so much time stressing over whether or not people approve of me, I never stopped to ask did I approve of me. If I follow God and my morals and do the best I can, that is enough. If I do my best to empathize, listen, and help others, I am doing the right thing. Because I cannot please everyone or control others. I can’t even control my circumstances or what happens around me. But I can control my attitude, perception, and responses.

So to you out there, who has been drowning instead of thriving, you still have the opportunity to turn it all around. If you are like me and really struggle with the state of the world right now, don’t despair. Instead add a little joy to the lives of those around you. Take this opportunity to listen to others and share your experiences. I encourage you to not get lost in the actions of others, instead focus on the one thing you can control, yourself.

You are an original, so even though this is soooooo clique… Beeeee Yourself

(if anyone gets the Aladdin reference, props to you)

Stay Excellent Friends,

Megan